Funny Astrology from Krsna Lila

This story is originally told in Chapter Six of the Krsna-Bhavanamrta of Vishvanatha Chakravarti. Some familiarity with the Characters of Krsna lila is required. Krsna is the supremely sweet personality of Godhead. He is madly in love with Radha the supreme personality of love. Madhu(mangal) is Krsna’s studious/priestly (and very funny) friend.

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Krsna: Madhu, why didn’t you come play with us today!? We had a great time!

Madhu: I was studying!

Krsna: Studying what? And from who?

Madhu: Astrology, I was studying Astrology from Bhaguri Muni’s teacher!

Krsna: Oh. What good is that?

Madhu: Oh, nothing much… just… omniscience!

Krsna: Omniscience? OK, then, tell me what I am thinking about right now!

Madhu: Just like that? Do you think I can do that in an instant, on demand!?

Krsna: OK, fair enough. What would it take for you to do it properly?

Madhu: Well, I can check your astrological birth chart, and compare it against the planetary positions at the current moment…

While saying this, Madhu began drawing Krsna’s birthchart in the sand – making various marks around it pertaining to the current planetary positions. All the while, he was rubbing his chin, shaking his head, looking at the sky very carefully. After a long while he again looked at Krsna…

Madhu: OK, this is what you are thinking about: On the slope of a charming hill there are two ponds. A golden swan swims there. You are obsessed in thought of how to catch this swam so you can enjoy playing with her. The problem is that she is in the middle of a large flock of swans and they are all very protective of her. They prohibit her from coming to your outstretched hand. So you are constantly scheming of different tricks and strategies but you can’t get that golden swan to come to you… Hahahaha, just see! I am a brilliant astrologer, so I am aware of everything!!!

Krsna: Wow!!! You really are a great scholar of mystical sciences! You read my mind perfectly! Madhu, now I need to know… look carefully into the stars and tell me if I will catch that swan today or not!

Again Madhu fell silent and into deep thought for a long while.

Madhu: Krsna, I studied the stars for a way you might catch that golden swan. This is how you should do it. Find a well camouflaged tree near her and hide in its branches. Then play your flute very, very sweetly – making music that matches the way she moves her wings. This will enchant her and she will come to you! …OK now, I figured this out for you, so you have to pay me! Pay me something commensurate with the work I did for you.

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Krnsa filled Madhu’s hands with delicious pomegranate seeds.

Madhu: Hey, I am a friend, not a bird!

In Sanskrit, savayas = friend, and vayas = bird.

Krsna: Birds and priests are both “twice born,” my friend!

In Sanskrit, both birds and priests are called “dvija” (twice born) – A bird’s egg is born first from the mother, and later the bird is born a second time by emerging from the egg. A priest is twice born also, once as a normal person and a second time when he achieves mystical knowledge.

Krsna: But since you are such a good scholar, here, have the whole pomegranate!

Madhu: [smiling happily] Since you generously gave everything you had to a priest like me, I grant the blessing that today you will get your hands on two very round pomegranates! Today, may you become like a pomegranate, blissfully coloring the mouth of your beloved with the red nectar of your lips!

PS – One of the funnier things that might escape notice on the first reading is that Krsna is always thinking about how to entice Radha, and playing his flute is nearly always the fool-proof means of doing so. It doesn’t take any astrological skill to figure that out. This is part of the joke in why Krsna gave such a small donation (a fruit) as payment for Madhumangal’s so-called “reading.” =)

- Vic DiCara (Vraja Kishor das)

www.vicdicara.com

Most Powerful Moon-signs and Lousy Astrologers

How come vedic astrology predictions are no longer good?

they were good years ago. i think vedic astrology is kind of becoming obsolte now because its never accurate anymore!

Image by ecstaticist via Flickr

On what basis do you make this claim? Is this your personal observation that “years ago” you relieved excellent predictions, but nowadays you receive poor predictions? Is that why you ask the question? If so, maybe you do not have the same astrologer(s) these days as you did in the past?

Have you considered that “years ago” there was no such thing as the internet? People would personally go see an astrologer face to face to get a prediction, and they would remunerate the astrologer appropriately. Do you think this could compare to clicking on some computer generated webpage made by a person who not only doesn’t know you, not only can’t see you, not only hasn’t even calculated your horoscope, but also is not even a person but a computer program?

Astrology predictions (vedic or otherwise) are “no longer good” for people who are no longer approaching good astrologers (vedic or not).

Does your moon sign reflect your personality more than your sun sign?

The Sun is the ego/identity/soul
The Moon is the mind/emotions/desires

They both have to do with personality. Everything in the horoscope has to do with personality, if you are reading it to discover more about personality. But most of what we consider the core of our personality is our emotions, opinions and desires – which is the domain of the Moon, not the sun.

That said, you can’t really learn much in reliable detail without getting beyond the misconcept that astrology is about “signs.” Learn about houses, planets, aspects, alignments, etc. Then you will start getting into the real thing.

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What are the most powerful or beneficial planet combinations?

Here is a different way to think about it – which is the way the ancients more often and more thoroughly thought about your question – by considering the combinations of planets not merely for what they naturally are but for what roles they play in the individual horoscope. The houses a planet owns determine what roles they play for that individual. So the ancients would answer your question by explaining the combinations of various house lords, rather than planets by name.

If you care to use an ancient zodiac (sidereal) and this ancient system together you will find it is extremely reliable.

The most powerful/beneficial combinations occur when planets who own angular houses combine with planets who own trinal houses. In other words when planets owning houses 1, 4, 7 or 10 (the angles) combine with planets who own houses 1, 5 or 9 (the trines).

“combinations” can occur in a few ways, such as obvious conjunctions, or by mutual aspect, or by mutual exchange, even mutual exchange of lunar mansions can form combinations.

Of all these possibilities, combination of the 9th and the 10th lord is the most powerful it goes like this in decending order of power:

9+10
1+9
5+4
1+5
1+10
1+4
Anything formed with the 7th lord is noteworthy but not as powerful as the others.

Next, if you see the planets making the combination have good strength and dignity, then that particular combination is going to be very strong. Even more important, if the same sorts of combinations occur not only when viewing houses from the point of view of the ascendant, but also when viewed from the point of view of the moon, it is extremely powerful.

Foe example, if a horoscope has the 9th and 10th lords combined. And then you look at the moon and notice that the planets owning the 9th and 10th signs from the Moon are also combined – this is a phenomenally strong and powerful combination.

Generally the house in which the combination occurs (or houses) tells you the area in which the power and fortune expresses itself for the person.

- Vic DiCara

www.vicdicara.com

Q&A For Today: 2010 November 25

What the F*ck is a Descendant?

And why isn’t it as talked about as the ascendant is?

The a-s-s-endant is the a-s-s-endant. Of course it is more talked about then the d.cendant. Asses are fun.

Anyway, ascend means “rise.” Descend mean “fall” or “set”. The spot where the stars rise is the ascendant – its the eastern horizon. The spot where they fall / set is the descendant – its the western horizon. The eastern horizon is the focal point of the first house. The western horizon is the focal point of the seventh house.

Its not talked about as much because the ascendant represents the self, and is considered the anchor point determining everything else. Rightly so, because if the stars did not rise they would not set. So the ascendant is the anchor of the descendant. Anyway, being the point representing the rise of the physical self into the world, naturally the ascendant grabs all the attention – since all of us ego-creatures are mainly interested in our physical selves, no?

Are Asteroids Important in Astrology?

There are two schools of astrology, basically. There is one which seeks to invent new methods, while the other seeks to preserve and improve ancient methods.

There is a very good reason why there are these two different schools, because there are two zodiacs. One is tropical and the other sidereal. The tropical zodiac is in constant flux, always changing. The sidereal zodiac is always the same, fixed and constant. Use of the tropical zodiac required (and thus inspired) invention of newer and newer methods and tools, because what works in one century might not work in the next – as the zodiac itself constantly shifts around the “north star.” Use of the sidereal zodiac is the mother of the other school of astrology – which can keep using the same, ancient techniques over and over again, perfecting and polishing them, hopefully.

Asteroids, and all sorts of similar things (including “outer planets” like Uranus, etc) are a product of the “new school” of astrology – the one that always seeks inventions. So perhaps asteriods might be of some use and import to astrologers of that school.

I am a pretty devoted member of the other school – the one that tries to perfect and polish what has stood the test of time. So for me, asteroids are meaningless in terms of how I derive meaning and value from observing the heavens.

What in the chart makes one avoid reality?

At least in a sidereal system this mostly has to do with the 12th house and its lord. When the 12th house is highly occupied, or its lord is very influential in the chart, there is a distinct feeling that “reality” is unreal and not worth much attention.

Whose more promiscuous: Cancers or Sagittarius?

This is really a counterproductive way to apply astrology. Promiscuity comes from the conditions of the 8th house/lord (for sexual energy), 12th house/lord (for desire to escape “reality” and enjoy doing so via orgasm), and the 5th house/lord (creative impetus) and the 7th house/lord (relationship nature).

I can have fun on Yahoo! Answers, and that’s great, but I will get nowhere with astrology in the meantime, until I start to approach astrology in this fashion and educate myself on it to the extent that the above paragraph makes simple, and clear sense.

Asking to diagnose promiscuity by a tropical sun sign is like asking a doctor to diagnose aids with a thermometer.

Can you predict my sister’s partners name?

(They actually gave their birth details as well!)

Theoretically it could be done, as each 3º20′ (“navamsha”) of the sky has a specific sound/ letter – but it would require a quality of astrologer that you would not only not find on Yahoo! Answers you probably wouldn’t even find in the entire historical epoch of Kali Yuga (432,000 years surrounding the modern period).

How to Interpret two planets aspecting one other planet

if have, for an example, Jupiter squaring Saturn at same time that Neptune opposes Saturn?

Answer difficult questions by making them more real and relating them to something you are familiar with and have good experience with. Planets are like people, so think of the whole question in that light.

Two planets aspecting one other planet = You having two friends who are both influencing you. Lets say you yourself are a very realistic, cautious private person (“Saturn”). Lets say one friend is very optimistic, hopeful, and generous (“Jupiter”) and another friend is very wild, daring, and odd-ball (“Rahu” or “Neptune”).

When you hang out with your “Jupiter” friend your natural pessimism and restrictive tendencies get influenced by her joviality and hopeful optimism. When you hang out with your “Rahu/Neptune” friend you start to try new things and sometimes get really outlandish in how pessimistic and critical you are.

Now just imagine hanging out with both of them at the same time!

Outlandish positivity regarding the hopeful effects of your criticisms, etc. etc. Just keep putting 2+2+2 together and always maintain a PRAYERFUL attitude towards the whole act of divination so that higher powers can guide your mind more easily into the right avenues of thought.

What, astrologically, gives a person “presence”

The Sun has a very big “presence” – When the Sun aspects the ascendant and/or ascendant lord you can predict a commanding presence. I do have that, yeah. (Sun aspecting ascendant) The Sun is the lord of my 8th house, so that factors in to the type of presence I give off.

Other planets give their own type of presence, but not as strongly as the sun.

The next would be the Moon – gives a softer, gentler, more sweet presence.

Next powerful would be Jupiter – giving a trustworthy presence. (I have it! =) – Jupiter in mutual aspect with my ascendant lord)

Saturn, Rahu and Ketu (N/S Nodes) – give really UNUSUAL presence (Shoot, I have this too! Saturn aspects my ascendant.)

Mars gives “intimidating” or “commanding/demanding” presence. (I got that too, I have to admit – Mars aspecting my ascendant AND ascendant lord.)

etc.

Then there are also certain specific alignments (“yogas”) that give presence. King-alignments (“raja-yogas”) where lords of angles combine mutually with lords of trines (I have this going on in my 8th house). Or especially something called the “Mountain” alignment (“Parvata yoga”), which can happen when the 12th lord and 1st lord mutually aspect one another (I have that one too. Boy oh boy.).

Is the 12th House Bad?

Personally I love the 12th house, it is the sky above the eastern horizon. The eastern horizon represents birth – the physical self. The sky above that horizon holds all the “elements” that “weather” and “erode” the land below it – the physical self, and the LIE / ILLUSION of material “realities.” I think it is a fantastic place, literally – one understands the reality of “fantasy” etc.

Here are two articles I have written about it:

SEX, DRUGS, and ENLIGHTENMENT: http://vicdicara.wordpress.com/2010/04/0…

WHERE EVERYTHING ENDS: http://vicdicara.wordpress.com/2010/04/2…

=)

- Vic DiCara (Vraja Kishor das)

www.vicdicara.com

Q&A for Today: 2010 November 24

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The Ever-Present Comparison of Vedic Astrology with Western Astrology

Almost all of todays questions and answers focus on this topic! For some reason it is “trending” or something =)

Sidereal or Western???

Some rich guy wants to buy a guitar, right? He’s going to buy a Paul Reed Smith – the most expensive guitar in the shop. Cuz he knows that guitar is the “best” they make. You know what though? That guy sucks at playing guitar, hahaha. Sorry to say. Anyway… the guy might as well by a cheap bc rich or some other chinese knockoff guitar. Because, frankly, since the dude can’t play guitar, it doesn’t matter if his guitar is the best or the worst, whatever he plays is going to sound horrible.

Its the same thing with astrology!

Maybe sidereal systems are better than western systems? Maybe visa versa? But the real issue is that 98% of the people asking and aswering these questions, well… “suck” at “playing” an astrological birth chart, etc. People don’t know much at all about astrology, thinking that it is all about “12 signs” – so really, what difference does it make if they use a “better” system or a “worse” system? Regardless of what system they use, their results are going to be little more than blind chance or some flowery vaguery.

You know what I mean? I hope this makes sense without being overly offensive. Sorry if this offends anyone, but I think it needs to be said. I think the most important thing is to first of all get deep into understanding actual astrological techniques. That is much more important than deciding if Sidereal or Western is “better”.

Signs are signs… they are not really astrology. They are just signs taken out of context. I might use a tropical sign or a sidereal sign – but if thats all I’m considering (just signs) I still haven’t really scratched the surface of what either astrological system (tropical or sidereal) is about, at all.

The thing about sidereal is that it has not changed for thousands of years. Therefore very ancient, fundamental, and well-developed and researched systems of interpretation STILL work very reliably on charts cast in the sidereal zodiac system. If you learn those systems and definitions and apply them to sidereal charts you can be extremely consistent and deliver good readings on a frequency that is much better than pure chance.

Probably you could do the same thing too in Western Astrology, with the tropical zodiac – provided you learn the appropriate western interpretation systems and apply them systematically.

The reason I personally prefer the sidereal and ancient practices is because I have more trust in things that stand the test of time.

Sidereal or Vedic???

If you are asking Sidereal Modern vs. Sidereal Vedic? Interesting question!

I prefer ancient sidereal methods (aka. “vedic”) because the thing I like about the sidereal zodiac is that it doesn’t change. It is the same always. So thousands of years of theory and practice can develop around it – which is why I like to leverage the ancient techniques that stand the test of time.

If you are asking Sidereal/Vedic vs. something else (western/tropical)…

98% of people “into astrology” don’t know what astrology is about. They think it revolves around “signs.” For these people, regardless if they use sidereal system or tropical system – they are still just running on luck, instinct, etc. If I suck at playing guitar, it doesn’t matter if I have a good guitar or a bad one – you know what I mean? So for most people asking and answering this question, the point is moot.

One more interesting point that never gets airtime…

“Vedic” astrology (Jyotish) is BOTH sidereal AND tropical. We use the tropical zodiac for several very important calculations – particularly when determining planetary strength.

Does your sidereal sign describe you better than your tropical sign?

Signs are signs… they are not really astrology. They are just signs taken out of context. I might use a tropical sign or a sidereal sign – but if thats all I’m considering (just signs) I still haven’t really scratched the surface of what either astrological system (tropical or sidereal) is about, at all.

The thing about sidereal is that it has not changed for thousands of years. Therefore very ancient, fundamental, and well-developed and researched systems of interpretation STILL work very reliably on charts cast in the sidereal zodiac system. For example, interpretation of house lordships – an extremely fundamental principle of astrology – works surprisingly well in sidereal charts (provided you know the ancient definitions of the houses and so forth).

If push comes to shove, I would say, “YEP” especially for the rising sign, the sidereal sign and its ancient/sidereal definition will be more accurate. But I will qualify it by saying that “more accurate” still isnt “very accurate” because we would still just be dealing with a sign or a few signs and ignoring the dozens of other equally and more important astrological principles of how to make sense out of the planets and stars.

Is the rising sign the most important sign in Vedic astrology?

As long as you keep holding on to the idea that astrology is about “signs” you are going to be hit or miss regardless of what system of signs you use.

The rising sign is the most important sign in any real system of astrology – not because that “sign” is supposed to make a blanket description of you that “matches really well”, but because that sign is the anchor point of the rest of the chart, around which the rest of the houses arrange themselves – and therefore the basis on which interpretation of the chart can proceed.

Are 6/8 quincunx signs compatible?

No, the 6/8 pattern (“quincunx”) indicates incompatibility with about 75% intensity.

Other alignments may make you very compatible with a person with whom you happen to have a 6/8 pattern, but nonetheless, the 6/8 pattern is NOT one of the alignments contributing to that compatibility. For example, my wife of 13 years is 6/8 with my rising sign – due a lot to the rest of the positive factors aligning in our two charts. The 6/8 thing brings some challenges to our relationship – but the rest of the positive things make us able to overcome those challenges, and even enjoy them somewhat and build on them.

- Vic DiCara (Vraja Kishor das)

www.vicdicara.com